Friday, December 16, 2005

In the Christmas spirit...

(Disclaimer: Gina enjoys sarcasm and finds it extemely funny. If you do not feel similarly, skip to the pretty pictures below. If you enjoy sarcasm as I do, read on, faithful ones!)

A few suggestions to help you relax and enjoy the true meaning of this holiday season. I starred the ones I've personally tried. :)
  • A double espresso before bed is always a winner.
  • *Recognize your limitations, then ignore them.
  • *Recognize other people's limitations. Then tell them what they are.
  • Make a list of all the people who have ever dumped you. Contact them once a year and try to re-start the relationship.
  • Gardening is relaxing. Never garden.
  • *Make schedules whenever possible. Include an unrealistic number of tasks. Agonize over why you are constantly falling behind.
  • Make yourself a Humor Free Zone. If you ever find yourself laughing at a predicament you are in, go to the bathroom and pull yourself together.
  • *Really tense up your muscles. Try to stay this way all day. If this proves impossible, you have yet failed again at a really simple task.
  • *Don't delegate...they'll only do it wrong.
  • Record the sound of a dentist's drill. Play it at bedtime.
  • Get married as often as possible.
  • Find out when your friends' favorite TV program is on. Then call them seven minutes after it starts.
  • Overspend on meaningless material gifts while frantically shopping on Christmas Eve.
  • *Take every opportunity to give others advice. Especially on subjects of which you have very little or no knowledge.
  • *Never let yourself, or anyone else, off the hook.
  • *At dinner parties try to bring the conversation around to sex, politics, or religion. Preferably all three at once.
  • Ask single women if they've got a boyfriend yet. Repeat on Valentine's Day.
  • *And finally, prepare lunch for 2300 students with no power. Throw in trying to teach 2300 middle schoolers in the hallways, and in the dark, the day before vacation!!!
And, finally, what you've all been itching to see...a Christmas comic or two!!!






























Coming soon...blog posts from South Korea!!!

posted by Gina @ 9:46 PM

2 Comments:

At 7:03 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My personal fav...

*Recognize your limitations, then ignore them.

Unforunatly I have been good at this one over the past year or so, however putting sarcasm aside, I have now started recognizing them and fixing them.

(sarcasm)
If anyone is also inspired to do this please feel free to contact me because I am also very good at...

*Recognize other people's limitations. Then tell them what they are.
*Take every opportunity to give others advice. Especially on subjects of which you have very little or no knowledge.

 
At 2:16 PM, Blogger Emmuh said...

Oh, dear. The sad little snowperson. It took me a while to figure it out. Mental Dialog: "Is it hot water and they are carrying it like the Ark?" Maybe its just any unfrozen liquid, which might be dangerous and make you melt?" "Oh, no. It's a death melt in the family."

 

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